Your elderly father passed away a few months ago, and now mom’s living alone in the house you grew up in. Ever since dad died mom just hasn’t been the same, and you can just tell she isn’t taking care of herself like she should. But now it’s gotten to the point you’re worried about her health and wellbeing, and if mom will be able to continue aging comfortably in place at home. Fortunately, there are several proven ways to help a parent cope with the death of a spouse, starting with these.

How Losing a Spouse Impacts a Senior

When an older couple has been married for years, each partner oftentimes slides into specific roles within the household. For example, your mom may have taken care of the grocery shopping, laundry and cleaning, while dad focused on paying the bills and doing the yardwork. As a result, when one dies the surviving partner is forced to take on tasks that are unfamiliar, which can oftentimes be overwhelming.

Then there’s the loneliness factor, which typically hits hardest around meal time or other activities that the couple once shared. Widowed women oftentimes also feel unsafe at night while home alone. According to experts, these are some of the warning signs to look for after a senior has lost a spouse:

  • Not paying their bills on time
  • Rapid weight loss
  • Substance abuse
  • Not keeping up their home or appearance like before
  • Not enough food in the home
  • Lack-of-interest in activities once enjoyed
  • Not getting enough exercise

If your widowed parent is currently exhibiting one or more of these behaviors, their health and wellbeing may be at risk.

How Can I Comfort My Grieving Parent?

There are several ways to comfort an aging parent who’s going through a grieving process, including these:

Respect Their Unique Grieving Pattern

According to specialists at the Johns Hopkins Medical Center (www.hopkinsmedicine.org), there are 5 stages in a grieving process. However, your mom may not experience those in the same order, or for the same duration, as someone else. For example, if dad died after a long illness, your mom may still be dealing with constant reminders like unpaid medical bills or writing thank you notes to loved ones. Let her grief play out in its own way without forcing the issue.

Address Her Physical Needs

Losing a spouse is stressful, and that pent-up emotion can cause many physical problems. Try to help mom take better care of herself by:

  • Making sure she’s eating a healthy diet
  • Finding ways to help her get enough sleep
  • Getting her to her doctor’s appointments
  • Helping around the house with cleaning, laundry, yardwork, repairs, etc.
  • Encouraging her to exercise and engage in social activities

Understand Personality Changes

It’s common for a grieving partner to go through sudden behavioral changes after the death of a spouse, as they look for ways to fill time during the day. Forgetfulness, disorganization and a lack of concentration are all common in the weeks and months following the loss of a spouse. Be empathetic to mom’s personality changes while offering any support you can.

Watch for Substance Abuse

Someone who’s experienced the loss of a loved one may become depressed and try to self-medicate with alcohol or drugs, including prescription medications that are sitting around the house. Watch for signs of substance abuse exhibited by your parent, and speak with their doctor if you have concerns.

Take Care of Yourself Too

Dad’s loss will also affect you, so make sure that you’re also taking care of yourself by getting plenty of exercise and sleep, eating healthy foods and not abusing alcohol or drugs. Get regular check-ups at your doctor’s office and spend quality time with your spouse, kids and friends. Serving as a caregiver when you have your own job and household to manage can sometimes be a heavy burden to bear.

Hire an In-Home Caregiver to Comfort Your Parent

Comforting a grieving parent after the death of a spouse can be mentally and physically exhausting. When you need a break, call Seniors Prefer Homecare. One of our carefully screened and well-trained aides can step in and help-out around your senior’s home with duties like light housekeeping, personal hygiene, meals, medication reminders, transportation and companionship.

And, to keep your loved one comfortable and independent, our family trusted home care services can be individually tailored in an affordable package that will put your mind at ease. To schedule a FREE, in-home consultation with Seniors Prefer Homecare in the Huntsville or Tuscaloosa, AL, areas, please visit: www.seniorspreferhomecare.com now!